My Sister and the Chickens

God blessed me with a sister. We are 15 months apart in age. (She's older but swears that everyone thinks she's younger...whatever!) Anyway, I love her to death. I get her. She gets me. She's always got my back. One of her favorite sayings is "Nobody can beat up my sister but me!" That about sums it up.

Anyway, when me and my family are lucky enough to get a vacation, my sister is good enough to come and take care of things for us while we're gone. Including the chickens. Did I mention she hates chickens? Well, she says she hates chickens, but I'm not really buying it. I'm going to share with you three e-mails that she sent to me last summer while she was on chicken duty. I'll post one a day:

Chicken log day 2 (there is no day 1)

"Earth date" 8-13-09.....Capt. Lisa reporting....

Day two of taking care of the dreaded chickens.... not many eggs to collect yesterday or today. nasty chickens have broken...no, smashed, at least two to three eggs a day to date. Today momma chicken was sitting sideways in her box. Went to move momma bird when she pecked me! (Evil bird!) Tried to move her a second time but was denied by the evil pecking again. I will not be thwarted. I will get those eggs, it is my mission. I think to myself, must get a stick to move momma bird, but no, too far to travel for a prodder stick. What to do??? One egg is visible but not close enough to snatch,...but, what's this? I have a bag for the eggs in my hand. I must blindfold the chicken, YESSS! Placed bag in front of momma bird,...like taking candy from a baby. Alas! I know not how many eggs are there for momma bird will not budge (evil bird). Decide to tip up nesting box and give a gentle shake,...yes!...this produces another egg. I tell momma bird that's fine, she can sit there. I blind her again to take egg then proceed to give the nesting box another tip and gentle shake, alas,...there are no more eggs. I have won the battle for this day. Take that momma bird. Victory is mine!!! (insert evil laugh here.)